SURRENDERELLA PART 3

The OLD Identity-Pleaser

 

As you recall from our last blog, Surrenderella, whose NEW name is ‘Princess Beloved,’ took off her crown then laid her scepter of authority on the bed. She replaced the crown with her old head rag. We discussed because she didn’t know her NEW identity, she was not aware of how to utilize the power and authority she received by being married to ‘Prince Beloved.’ We also talked about how her life relates to us. When we give our hearts to the Lord Jesus Christ we don’t understand our new position In Christ and the NEW Life we possess In Him.  So, like Surrenderella, we revert back to what is familiar and comfortable; that’s why it is so important to renew our minds to what’s really TRUE concerning our NEW Life In Christ.

 

 

Today, let’s continue talking about the head rag Surrenderella wears and what it represents. The head rag represents her OLD Identity. Before SINderella’s name was changed to Surrenderella, in order to survive in her environment of rejection, abasement, and ridicule, she learned to become a Pleaser. Let’s look more in-depth at the flesh pattern of Pleasing and how the flesh operates through us.

 

Pleasers are driven by the need for Acceptance. Pleasers will do whatever you need them to do so they won’t be treated harshly or rejected. They are also driven by the need to have others think well of them. Finally, they are driven by the need to have others like them, by being compliant, submissive, and passive. Below are other characteristics that deeply affect Pleasers.

 

• I am bothered deeply by what other people think of me because I am sometimes overly sensitive to others’ feelings and needs.
• I possess a servant’s heart, but the flesh uses it to my detriment and not for the Lord’s glory.
• I don’t know who I am so I will be whatever you want me to be.
• I am like a chameleon, I will change with every person, and circumstance to please them.
• I will do whatever it takes to make you happy, even neglect my needs.
• Service to others provides a narcotic effect for me.
• Self-worth is found in what I do for others and not in whose I am
• I hate to say “NO.”
• To be accepted, I will change my appearance, my attitude, my opinions, just to be liked.
• I can be double-minded and can’t always be depended upon when I have so many people to please.

 

 Effects of Being a Pleaser of Others

 

• I can’t express my true feelings to others or myself.
• I avoid expressing feelings of anger and internalize them which can turn into depression.
• I will make insensitive people feel good at the expense of hurting myself.
• I am often drained, worried, anxious, bitter, and unhappy because I have neglected my own needs, trying to appease others.
• I can’t give myself totally to the Lord; I have spread myself too thin.
• I have a very shallow relationship with the Lord, therefore I can’t attend to His desires.
• I am often taken advantage of because I do so much for others and no one does much for me.

 

Galatians 1:10– Now am I trying to win the favor of men, or of God? Do I seek to please men? If I were still seeking popularity with men, I should not be a bond servant of Christ (the Messiah). Amplified version

 

In compromising and yielding to the flesh pattern of Pleasing, we negate the will and purposes of our Father and His wonderful plans and desires for us. We are torn between two opposing opinions and kingdoms.

 

KEYS TO FREEDOM

 

• Acknowledge the TRUTH that you have been obeying the flesh of Pleasing others to be Accepted.
• Admit and agree with THE LORD that He has already Fully Accepted you In Christ.
• Uncover what you have done by Pleasing others and how this has affected you.
• Repent because this is displeasing to HIM.
• Relinquish ALL CONTROL and PLANS TO CHANGE YOUR SELF.
• NOW… LET GO and SURRENDER this issue into HIS Hands.
• Trust the results into THE LORD’s hands….Don’t look back! Don’t look back!
• THANK HIM FOR REVEALING THIS TRUTH TO YOU….WORSHIP HIM…WORSHIP HIM.
• WATCH HIM CHANGE YOUR WANT TO….

 

Prayer: Thank you, Papa, for revealing to us the flesh pattern of Pleasing. The world and others around us may think this is a wonderful trait to have but this flesh pattern keeps us in bondage to people and the flesh. But, I am so glad You came to live in us and through us to make us FREE. Teach us to be more sensitive to you who has fully accepted us, rather than seeking the acceptance of others. Amen.

 

Excerpts from “People Pleasing: Having Trouble Saying No” by Kali Munro, M.Ed  and Carol Laird, Flesh Patterns: Exchanged Life Ministries (now called Network 220)